I have to say I'm simply at a loss to even guess whether these people actually believe their own bullshit any more. Sorry, "Dean Z." That wasn't very nice of me, and you sure seem like a nice person. Law schools are full of "nice people," who are genuinely (I guess) caring and empathetic and concerned about their students. I work with a lot of people like that, and I don't doubt they really believe that they care, deeply, about the actual welfare of the people who pay their salaries. They believe a lot of things.
This isn't even worth saying because any one who doesn't realize it already is the kind of authority-worshiping tool who is beyond hope anyway, but what the heck: the idea that when Sarah Zearfoss stood up last week in front of that audience of all-too-naive 0Ls she didn't know how many otherwise completely unemployed 2011 UMLS grads took "post-grad fellowships," i.e., barely above minimum wage stipends to perform full-time legal work several months after graduation, is a pitiful, miserable, shameful lie. Of course she knew. How the hell could she not know?
I mean I can tell you off the top of my head exactly how many of its own grads NYU hired in 2010: 38. Virginia hired 40. Fordham "hired" 14.7% of its own class. CU had 27 people in the class of 20011 in such a program in January. I swear on the health of Denard Robinson's MCL that I didn't look those numbers up right now. I know these things because I have voluntarily chosen to make it part of my professional responsibilities at present to know them. Zearfoss's whole job is nothing but to know exactly this kind of thing about the school that she works at. UMLS's students pay Zearfoss $178,500 per year to know these things. And she wants us to believe that after preparing a talk for a roomful of prospective students on the subject of whether going to UMLS makes sense for them financially she didn't happen to have this information at her disposal?
What is the matter with you people? Seriously. Just stop lying. If for no other reason that it insults our intelligence.
Also, $333.33. I'll say this for my employer: it least it's paying our unemployed grads $10,000 over three months. Michigan is swimming in money -- you just built yourself some more swank digs for a cool $102 million -- but you can't come up with more than $333.33 a week for 12 weeks for people that you charged $150,000K for what turned out to be a worse than useless degree?
Oh, and this "success story" you put up about what a wonderful thing you're doing for the one in five of your graduates who are flat-out unemployed several months after getting a degree from a top ten law school ought to be especially inspiring to prospective students:
I really, really wanted to pursue a career in the public sector, and the Postgraduate Fellowship program was definitely central to making that possible. There were over 270 applicants, and they interviewed 18, the vast majority of whom had more experience than I do. Had I not already been working here [as a postgraduate fellow] and proving that I could litigate against more experienced attorneys, there is no way I would have been seriously considered.Kids, this is a test. See if you can figure out what's wrong with this picture. Please select the one best answer. Results not typical. Past performance is not a guarantee of future returns. Neither the Securities and Exchange Commission nor any state securities commission has approved or disapproved of these securities or passed upon the adequacy or accuracy of the prospectus.